True Blood Recap: Gettin’ An Eyeful, True Blood Style

posted by EC Stacey

Today’s installment of the True Blood recap is brought to you by…

SAM'S SHIRTS. Short or long sleeved you can't go wrong with a Sam's Shirt. Don't shift without one!

EC:  There was a lot of development in this past Sunday’s episode, so let’s get to MY favorite part…drunken, simple-minded Eric. Sure, he can’t remember anything, but not only did Eric inherit Jason’s ridiculous looking sleeveless hoodie, he also now has gained Jason’s cluelessness. Yes, I miss bad boy Eric. (As does Team Seth) However, this is a fun bit of distraction to see Alexander play a goof ball. It’s not only refreshing, but makes me giggle. Particularly, the drunken gooseing of Miss Stackhouse. Who knew that fairy blood equals the same buzz of a six pack of Bud Light. (Cause they are down south, y’all.) It also inspires this:

SWD: My fav line,” Croccccccccoooooooddddiiiiiiiloooooos” said in menacing crazy Viking voice. This is soo book Eric, even down to the wearing of Jason’s old sweatshirts. Or wait, did Sookie pick up Eric some clothes from Walmart? Either way, Viking sheriff in Gildan is funny. I’m thinking the black tanks of previous seasons were American Apparel. They go uber low with the U necks. Just ask VD’s Stefan.

It's like talking to a very tall toddler

EC:  Also, the added Alcide bonus…  

Fun at the creek during the summer, Bon Temps style

EC:  I mean come on now, Ball is an evil mastermind! This scene is the reason that the female demographic for these types of shows and movies are so high. It certainly isn’t the gore factor. No, it’s the shirtless men…umm…I mean romance! That’s it…romance! The scene with Sookie, Alcide and Eric was pretty funny. Which is good, because the rest of it was an angst fest. Starting with Debbie getting ready to jump back on the crazy train. At least we had an almost Sookie/Eric kiss!

SWD: Sookie looked so cute in that scene too! I want her green mini jacket.  Friend of a friend has 4 large, menacing dogs (rott, shepherd, etc.) and a chihuahua. The chihuahua OWNS them. It reminds me of Sookie and her pack of alphas.

EC: Pam gets a face lift. Or is it face melt? It looked painful. Now we know that hippie Marnie is possessed by a very pissed off ancient witch. Being burned at the stake will do that to a girl. #lessonslearnedfromSalem. Massachusetts that is. Not #lessonslearnedfromDaysofourLivesSalem. However, both Days of Our Lives and True Blood had characters that were possessed. Plus, True Blood is pretty much a gory soap opera. Now they should just have Sami Brady do a crossover.

SWD: That freaked me out! Poltergeist flashbacks!

Pam, if you were interested in getting some work done, I would have suggested a certified plastic surgeon.

EC:  Oh Bill…Bill…Bill…you went from your dream girl, Sookie to your great, great, great granddaughter. Dude, that’s messed up. Must be good to be king. Not! Karma is going to be biting you on the bottom. Look, it already did! Sookie wouldn’t let you look for Eric in her house. That’s right, she’s going to leave you for a Viking! Oh and the grandmother from WHO’S THE BOSS is flirting with you. Oh where, oh where, is Tony Danza when you need him?

SWD: Mona! The original cougar… still going strong and chatting up Bill. Oh wait, he’s older. Betty White needs to be on True Blood. She could be Octavia!

Well this was a bad idea, Bill.

EC:  There was a bunch of shifter drama. Sam’s lady has a kid and a crazy ex. Who happens to be a werewolf. Of course. Couldn’t they just make the guy a crazy dentist or something? Maybe, a demented florist? Change things up a bit? Oh and more Tommy. Being that his dead beat parents put him on a steel chain leash, I don’t think will be getting away from Tommy for awhile. Ugh.

SWD: You KNOW Sam’s going to save him. Take him back in, buy him shirts.

Worst T.V. Parents of the Year Winners 2011

EC:  Poor Hoyt. His relationship with Jessica was already on shaky ground. It’s never a good thing when Jess decides to get relationship advice from PAM. It leads to naughty decisions like snacking on young men in the women’s bathroom. Seriously, that is not at all hygenic. It’s not like she’s a Edward Cullen type personality. If he was real, Edward would be carrying in sanitizing wipes and Purell. Which is funny, because he’s already dead.

SWD: Hoyt/Crystal hook up?

EC: Jessica’s saved Jason’s life with her blood. You know what that means…Jason and Jessica hook up ahead! (Which I am kind of loving!) Anything to het him away from crazy panther chick. All that inbreeding has made her a nut. It’s not going to end well. Mostly for Hoyt. He is definitely going to be moving back in with his Momma.  

SWD: Jason’s crzy “V” dreams are going to be insane@!

Let's all remember the good times, because they sure aren't going to last much longer

EC: I have a bad feeling that poor baby is going to be blamed for the evil doings of that creepy doll. Actually, what the heck is wrong with Terry and Arlene? That doll is nasty! Can you imagine the germs? Who cares if it’s evil. They should have a least put that thing in the washing machine or the fire place. That would be responsible parenting!

SWD: And I thought Cabbage Patch Dolls were creepy, but that thing?! Give me a Chuckie doll anyday.

Even Hoyt shouldn't be touching that nasty thing and he's a grown up!

Let us know what you though of this episode! Also, on Twitter @talksupe!

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2 Responses to “True Blood Recap: Gettin’ An Eyeful, True Blood Style”

  1. Bud Light? Try Natty Lite ya’ll! $20 for a keg! Kash n Karry throws in the tap for a refundable deposit!

    And yes, simple Eric = boo, silly Alex = awww.

    When Debbie smelled Alcide, I thought she could detect that he’d been around a vampire and was craving the V again.

    Tommy=major eyeroll. That actor does a great job though.

    That doll super creeps me out. “Not Your Baby” Um… you’re NOT REAL, creepy doll! Shudders.

  2. 3hboyshouse Says:

    Love the recap ladies! I am not sure how I feel about this year. I should have never read the books!

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