True Blood: The off season
posted by snowwhitedrifted (SWD/ West Coast Stacey)
What are they up to?
It’s been a long time since September. It’s just as long until early June, when True Blood Season 4 will air. That’s a long time off, and they always say, “Idle hands are the devil’s playground…” So what do we think these devils are up to in their spare time? Are they preparing for Season 4, “The Season of the Witch” (or as those of us who have read the books refer to it, “The Season of the Eric”. Seriously, if done right, and Ball hasn’t disappointed us yet, that shower scene will be more epic than the one in Psycho, and will ellicit more screams… not from horror). EC: I swear that shower scene… is it summer yet? I miss my show…also it was -2 degrees this morning. I hate you snow.
Sookie: Stocking up on apricot shower gel. See aforementioned shower reference. EC: Giggle. You might want to get the book now, just to prepare yourselves!
Lafayette and Jesus: polishing their broomsticks. Season of the witch, “Haaa’y”
Sam: Road Trip! Combing the country in search of kick-ass belt buckles. EC: Hopefully, picking some more of those glorious shirts while he’s at it!
EC: Are they going on tour with the Twilight wolves band, Imprinted on my Loins. BTW…gross.
Jason Stackhouse: Attending various Comic Cons. Picking up on the girls dressed as Bella and Alice. EC: Please. That poor boy will get confused and try to pick up on the Twi moms (SWD: like us??) dressed up like Rosalie. SWD: True, the panther may go for some cougar luv.
Vampire Bill: Well, if we’re going by the books, he’s not going to be to busy this season… so Bill is watching Vampire Diaries and wondering if he could audition for Klaus. He’s also sending emails to Jasper, wanting to do vamp versions of civil war re-enactments.
EC: Then he can jam with 100 Monkeys! Bongos anyone?
Jessica: Micro-brewing TruBlood in her bath tub, peddling it to other vampires.
Hoyt: Formed a gangsta rap duo with Mike Newton, touring the country. However, they are only booked in comedy clubs, following Jay Mohr on the “White Boy ’11” tour. EC: I want to see them on Def Comedy Jam! They would last a total of 30 seconds until they are pulled off stage.
Nadine Fortenberry (the mom is Nadine right, I’ve forgot): She was on the blue team of Biggest Loser, and was indeed the biggest loser, whittling herself down to a size 4. She now trains the Shreveport wolfpack, getting them in “sock” shape.
Holly: Joined forces with the girls from “Practical Magic” and is opening a small apothacary shop, their VIP customer: Claire Fraser. EC: I loved how you added Outlander! Almost ready to discuss book one!
Tara: In counseling. She knows she needs to get away from the bad boys before she ends up with Black Jack Randall. He’s the only one freakier than Franklin.
EC: And that Franklin was pretty freaky! Fun note…this weekend I happened to catch the Natalie Portman movie Where the Heart Is and who did appear as the romantic love interest…Franklin. With a large curly fro. It was scarier than Franklin’s fangs! More fun…he was on the Tudors with Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Last bit of fun…will be in Water For Elephants with our Robert Pattinson. I’m full of the fun facts today! Wait! I want him in Outlander too!
Sophie-Anne: EC: You know…I’ve heard she’s the reason that Spiderman the Musical keeps having the ‘accidents’. (Note to readers: The actress was rumoured to have been attched to the Broadway show) Russell wouldn’t let her try out for Mary Jane and now it’s revenge time! Plus, she’s bored. You can only play board games with your dinner so many times until it becomes ordinary.
Nan Flannagan: Watching, ” Sarah Palin’s Alaska”, developing a crush.
Talbot_Down_The_Drain: Eavesdropping in the pipes underneath Fangtasia. Eric sings showtunes when Pam does his highlights. Who knew? Talbot bubbles when Eric does his rendetion of “Cabaret”. EC: I bet Talbot loves Eric’s version of West Side Story.
Pam: Shoe shopping with the gals from Sex and the City. Shares pink cardigans with Charlotte, may be having a fling with Samantha, babysits (what?!!) Miranda’s teacup human. EC: Aww…Pam found her sensitive side on hiatus. Except, when the teacup human spits up formula on her pink velour track suit.
Rusell Eddington: Perfectly happy in is cement casing. He was buried with his iPhone and is kicking feathers on “Angry Birds”. He is also using his 3000 year old command of the english language to rule “Words with Friends” but thinks Godric cheats. He also set up a twitter account and tweets the night away. Follow him @VampRussell. #passingtimeincement
Eric Northman: exfoliating. Then slipping on his velour track suit and slipping on down to the Bada Bing with Tony Soprano. He’s looking for decor ideas for a Fangtasia remodel. EC: New Jersey is the epicenter of the umm…’classy’ gentlemens’ clubs. Ahh, Fuggetabout it!
So…i think it’s about five more months until True Blood! Let the countdown begin!
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