She looks an awful lot like Alice

posted by East Coast Stacey

Vampire Diaries Recap: Rose

*SPOILERS*

Talk about Dopplegangers....

So friends…I have finally scene this epic episode of Vampire Diaries and instead of epic, I mean Damon filled. You see, I have a theory (delusion) that Edward Cullen came to life and messed up my DVR.

Even supernatural men can't keep their mitts off of the remote.

So instead, of  Vampire Diaries my DVR taped CBS comedies, which I never watch. Why? Is he jealous of my enjoyment of the Damon character or is it anger over the Somerhalder ribbing of Pattinson over Twitter. Now, I haven’t been on Twitter for awhile, but I can say that it was funny and poor little Pattinson had no clue. The fact that  Peter F or Kellan didn’t clue him in was just wrong. You know what would be the best way to handle this? Not another EW voting contest, but mud wrestling. Wait…what were we talking about? Oh yeah, the episode.

EC: Creepy opening! Yay! All Vampire Diaries episodes should start with carnage.

SWD: They should. Carnage and black cars with severely tinted windows, mysterious stranger sporting baseball caps and dark glasses. Or wait, is that  just Rob hiding from the Papz?

Cars and Carnage in the first five minutes: WIN


EC:  Where to begin…Where to begin…Damon! Whenever, I see him with Caroline I can’t help thinking about season one. How times have changed…instead of him using her as his occasional snack, now they are partners I crime.  Well, Damon still bosses her around. I want her to smack him again. That would be fun. Also, Caroline and Tyler…I don’t think I like that idea very much. I really like vampire Caroline. Werewolf Tyler, not so much…
SWD: *beating dead horse* Why’d they keep Tyler and Kill *sniff* Uncle Mason? Or maybe they could make Matt a wolf. Then we could have a that inter-mythological creature coupling we secretly want.

 

 EC: The spells and all the blood…First Whiney and then Bonnie’s nosebleed. Gross, but this is a vampire show and not Gossip Girl. I guess there has to be blood. Was it just me or did Stefan look like he wanted to lick the map. I’m surprised he didn’t say, “Hey…how about I take that with me for reference. Nah, don’t worry about wiping it up. I’ll take care of it with, ahh…paper towels. Yeah…paper towels.”
SWD: You know what, I don’t know if we can keep on calling him Whiny, because ever since he grew some moonstones, he’s been, well, better. Did his new man arms win me over and I think of him now as Broody instead of Whiny?

 EC: So…the new vamps. Is it just me, but that Rose seems pretty cool and Alice like. It’s probably just the hair, but I like her. Even though she is handing Elena over for an unknown reason. Ha! She was going to be setup with Stefan! “More of a sucker for the bad ones”?  Rose and Damon hookup?
SWD: Yes, I see them hooking up before Damon and Witch Bonnie. I think “Alice/Rose” will be a good match for Damon. And that will be the catalyst for the Bonnie hook up because she’ll be jealous.

EC: The other vamp? He’s umm… kind of greasy. But it was funny when he said, ‘Doppalicious’. Good thing, he isn’t attractive and I didn’t get attached.
SWD: I liked the stubbly Robjaw and jumped when it became, uh, detached. *could use my bloody headless torso pic again, but refraining*

 

Damon: I miss Alaric... and fun. Stefan: Uh, oh, did he smell that?

EC: Stefan and Damon road trip’s are not as fun as Alaric and Damon road trips. Their ‘bonding’ is all laced with we want the same lady… Alaric really should have gone as the mediator. Wow, a blood bag instead of a 7-11 Big Gulp. Don’t get that on the interior of the car, boys! That stuff stains worse than a Slurpee.

SWD: Speaking of blood, do they ever mix it up, say Slurpee style? Do they ever blend it with ice, Margarita-like, stick it in a glass, add a little party umbrella and plastic monkey for festive flair? Pour it in shot glasses and down it? Microwave it in a souvenir mug and add a cinnamon stick for seasonal enjoyment?

Blended drinks, Vampire style. Someone please invite Talbot In A Jar to this cocktail table

 

EC:I like the remembering  the old times, you know bad boy Stefan. Best, funny Damon line, “What happened to that guy? He was a hoot.” I’m sure he was, I would be happy if ‘fun Stefan’ could come out to play.

SWD: We haven’t seen a flashback of fun Stefan, have we? They’d be great, I want to see him draining Jane Austen or a Bronte.

EC: What do this curse and the moonstone have to do with each other? I am confused, except that Elena has to die from this Elijah guy. A Volturi type guy…Vampire Diaries has a Volturi! That Elijah guy sure doesn’t look like Aro and his boys. Much better dresser. But is he wearing a plaid tie? Huh…plaid doesn’t say tough guy to me, buddy.

SWD: and he has “good boy” hair. Plus his name is Elijah, sorry not really a BAMF name. I’m guessing it’s supposed to sound Biblical Times esque, so he seems old, but couldn’t we just go with Lucifergus or something?

EC: However, Elijah is just as hardcore as the Twilight Volturi. Don’t really ‘do’ the forgiveness thing. Bye bye, greasy vamp.
SWD: I wonder if his head left a greasy spot on the floor, like when tortilla chips sit in a paper bag for more than 3 minutes.

EC: Tyler thinks Caroline is a Werewolf. Wrong there, rocket scientist. I did enjoy her going all vampire on him! They are so going to hookup. ugh. Poor little clueless Matt. He needs a lady. Maybe, Bonnie can get involved with him too. You see, this Whiney and Bonnie thing confuses me. Now that I know Whiney’s real age I still see him as sixteen. (It must be that cute, little baby face and the teenage attitude) Bonnie seems older. Darn it, I still want her with Damon. Ohh… the spell with the note to Elena was a neat party trick. I want a witch as a best friend to do cool tricks and stuff. Like’ magic’ me a cocktail.

SWD: That IS a good party trick. My only party trick is folding a dinner napkin to look like a dead chicken. #talent

EC: The fight scene was good! Good meaning, that Damon once again brought it! You see, Stefan is sometimes Mr. Super Goody Two-Shoes and his ‘kick ass’ falls flat.  I am not surprised that Damon totally staked the guy. Nice. However…Elena…Damon just SAVED you. Who should you be hugging, young lady?

SWD: She’s a tool. We’ll hung Damon for her. (*note <- check out my typo, I meant hug but I’m leaving it as “well hung Damon”, ‘cause that is freudian magicness right there)

 
 

 

Ew, Tyler, isn't that exactly how you eyed your "mom" last week?... I know this is the South, but...

EC: Many things happened in the end of this episode…Caroline opened up to Tyler, but covered for the brothers. Tyler is so going to hit that. Ugh.  Rose is going to stay? That could be good. Oh…Damon professing his love for Elena was the best part of the entire episode. It was romantic and swoon worthy. Stefan, who?

SWD: I can’t wait to see how this plays out brother vs. brother for the affections of (lame) fair Elena: who will win? I smell a vamp bros smackdown coming up.

EC:Wait…Volturi dude isn’t dead!!! Every episode a cliffhanger…love it!

 

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One Response to “She looks an awful lot like Alice”

  1. Nah, I think Damon’s ‘given up’ for now — which is why he compelled her to forget. I mean, he’s in love with her, but he knows he can’t be (for now–I’m not giving up hope.)

    That said, I’d rather seem him bang Katherine really hard because she’s sooo much cooler than Elena.

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